Kingsman: The Secret Service v Foxcatcher

KINGSMAN: The Secret Service

Summary

I hope you're sitting down for this one. Colin Firth plays a gentleman. 

So guess who fluked an invitation to the premiere of the Kingsman last Wednesday? That's right, MEEEEEEEEEE. As I skipped down the red carpet in my cheap suit and Dora the Explorer rucksack waving to all the hysterical teenager girls, one youngster brought my self-esteem crushing back to earth as I overheard her ask her friend "Who the fuck is he?"




Ironically I was thinking the same thing. 'Who the fuck am I? What the fuck am I doing here?' It was that kind of evening. I saw Take That singing from the balcony above the entrance to the Odeon. I thought 'What the fuck is Take That doing here?' I got into a jam packed Odeon and found free popcorn in my seat, what a touch. As I disrobed and performed my usual ritual of undoing my belt and fly, I noticed Claudia Schiffer pass me in the aisle and thought 'What the fuck is she doing here?

At premieres you don't have to sit through a load of adverts. Instead you get to see a montage of interviews with the stars outside on the red carpet. Gary Barlow bowled down the carpet, waved, signed pictures etc. One fan had completely lost her shit, much like I did meeting Pat Sharpe that time at Butlins back in 2009. She was trying to get a picture of Gary but her hands were shaking uncontrollably. At that moment Gary seized her phone, took the selfie with his cheek pressed against hers, gave her a quick kiss and then did a runner with her phone. HAHA I'm kidding. It was probably one of the sweetest things I've seen in my life and Gary Barlow is one hell of a stand up guy.

Once the actors had done fucking around on the red carpet outside the director and cast (minus Michael Caine) were introduced onstage. The director Matthew Vaughn made an interesting remark about the head of 20th Century Fox giving complete freedom with the edit he said "he's a good guy, he let me take a lot of risks and didn't even flinch, which perhaps he should have done". Now this peaked my interest especially as the violence in the film is pretty full on. The Colin Firth 'Church Scene Massacre' nearly derails the film completely. For my money the violent vignettes didn't quite marry up tonally with the comedy spy-spoof concept. It was like Quentin Tarantino had just seen The Matrix for the first time and then seconds later got a call to direct a Bond film. It's a bit wordy for a poster review but that is it in a nut-shell.

The violence aside, the film IS funny and I laughed several times. The soundtrack was very impressive and original. (Not the score I may add, that was clearly lifted from Casino Royale. But the songs chosen were unusual and brilliant).

After the film was done and dusted we all inched our way through the foyer, penned in like cattle. Just over my shoulder I saw Andy Serkis and thought 'What the fuck is he doing here?' Anyway I introduced myself and we had a quick chat about the film. I also got the chance to second his opinion that actors that create non-human characters in effect blockbusters are worthy of Oscar recognition. It was a wonderful exchange and I'd like to think one we'll both treasure. However he was most probably thinking 'What the fuck was he doing here?'

Tomato Meter - 100% (critics)

Tomato Meter - 98% (audience)

Peter Meter - 75%

FOXCATCHER

Summary

A wealthy man gets a team of youngsters together and watches them wrestle. Perfectly normal yeah?  Come on, didn't we see this coming?

I didn't know too much about the story going in, only that someone gets shot. It's actually a rather sad tale. You have John du Pont, one of the wealthiest guys in America, and Mark Schultz, an American Olympic Gold medalist wrestler. Its du Pont's ambition to elevate the profile of the sport and win gold for the American team in the Seoul Olympics.
Now what is interesting to note is that Mark Schultz has since come out and slated the movie. He has publicly criticized it saying how the director has fictionalized all the relationships and given it homosexual undertones.

To which I say, dude, its fucking wrestling. Wrestling by its very nature is two sweaty dudes on a mat wearing lycra, legs entwined, pulling faces of anguish. Of course its going to have an undercurrent of homosexuality. I personally think its a ploy by Schultz to get people to by his autobiography, upon which the film is based. I for one haven't read it and apparently, as often the case, there is artistic license being used by the director.


But the story is compelling, Steve Carrell had me on edge throughout the entire movie, and Ruffalo's nuanced performance is exceptional. What interests me about Ruffalo is that he never seems to do much, but often turns out to be the best thing about any movie in which he appears.
Its pace is deliberately ponderous, but I don't think that's a negative. Maybe it could have shaved off 15 minutes but I don't begrudge any movie building tension so long as it suits the narrative, which it does.

Tomato Meter - 87% (critics)

Tomato Meter - 74% (audience)

Peter Meter - 79%

VERDICT

Well what a week. I can tell you there are actually some knowing nods in the Kingsman to Trading Places. Now Trading Places is a hilarious film and I'm sure we all remember Jamie Lee Curtis getting her norks out in the mirror. No? Well here they are. Incidentally the reaction that Dan Aykroyd has in this clip is the same I gave when Claudia Schiffer passed me the other night. So WATCH Jamie Lee Curtis get her norks out and NOT Kingsman: The Secret Service OR Foxcatcher.