Sunday 30 December 2012

Life of Pi v Berbarian Sound Studio

I took my six year old niece to the cinema over the christmas period and caught Life of Pi.

Movie Info
Director Ang Lee creates a groundbreaking movie event about a young man who survives a disaster at sea and is hurtled into an epic journey of adventure and discovery. While cast away, he forms an amazing and unexpected connection with another survivor...a fearsome Bengal tiger.

Once again the adverts pre-film suggest that all the action happens in the foyer, and never a truer word said. First off a wonderful act of human kindness as a lady approached me with a spare ticket for the Life of Pi explaining that one of her party didn't turn up. So I accepted gratefully and with my cineworld membership, all I had to pay for was the popcorn. However my luck was about to turn as once in the packed theatre, I soon realized the film was showing in 3D. So I abandoned my 6 year old niece and went on a quest for some 3D glasses. I argued with the till girl that I should get them for free as I was Cineworld royalty with my black membership card but she refused to budge. I told her it would have been an idea to tell me the film was in 3D before going in, to which she raised a solitary eyebrow. I returned to the theatre and was relieved to find that my niece had not been captured by some opportunist film buff peado. I gave her the glasses which enveloped her entire face.
So you may have heard some rave reviews about this flick, I had not heard anything, but after sitting through the Parent Trap for the second time, 101 & 102 Dalmations, I would be buggered alive before sitting through Nativity 2. I had pleaded with my sister that Skyfall was still showing and that my niece would need to be introduced to the franchise at some point, but she flattly refused and so, Life of Pi was the compromising middle ground.
Let me start with saying how incredible this film looks. I mean just beautifully shot. I'm not sure how much of the Bengal Tiger scenes was CGI, probably all of it, but those scenes are masterfully choreographed. At two and a bit hours my niece sat patiently through, though I would say there could be at least 10 minutes shaved off without missing a beat. The end had an extra 5 minutes of unnecessary fluff and that created a slight anti-climax. Also there is a lot of GOD reference. Which again is not a criticism but could turn a few people off, especially in the first 20 minutes.
I think I'd need to read the book to get a definitive answer to the writers intentions for that. Which I am not going to do. Also I will say that this film lays down a marker for all CGI animals now. The Grey had pretty average effects for its wolfs, as did the entire Twilight saga, going by the trailers. You only have to look back at films like The Ghost and The Darkness to see how far technology has come, and I don't expect to settle for anything less than this standard from now on.

Tomato Meter - 89% (critics)
Tomato Meter - 90% (audience)
Peter Meter - 90%

Last night I grabbed a couple of bottles of Crabbies and went over to my mates flat in the sticks to watch Berberian Sound Studio.

Movie Info
In the 1970s, a British sound technician is brought to Italy to work on the sound effects for a gruesome horror film. His nightmarish task slowly takes over his psyche, driving him to confront his own past. Berberian Sound Studio is many things: an anti-horror film, a stylistic tour de force, and a dream of cinema. As such, it offers a kind of pleasure that is rare in films, while recreating in a highly original way the pleasures of Italian horror cinema. 
 
This film is probably aimed at geeks like me. I have a unnatural obsession when it comes to sound effects in cinema ever since I heard that Jaws disappearing into the water is actually the sound of a can of coke being poured over a concrete floor. So the homage part to old 70's films was actually quite interesting. Really interesting actually. The film itself looks stylish and has some good ideas. The main fault is that demands a lot of your patience as it is incredibly slow paced throughout, but your patience is never rewarded because it goes nowhere. It really goes fucking nowhere.
 
Tomato Meter - 70% (critics)
Tomato Meter - 54% (audience)
Peter Meter - 42%
 
 
I also caught up on a Roy Orbison documentary which can be found on the iPlayer, as well as the John Barry documentary, both were excellent. I managed to squeeze in 2 Bond flicks, Dr No and Casino Royale but as this will be the last blog of the year, my top 3 films have to be:
 
1# The Master
2# Skyfall
3# Life of Pi
 
Yes that means Killer Joe is not in the top 3 this year unfortunately. So watch The Master and NOT Life of Pi, or Berberian Sound Studio.
 
 

Saturday 22 December 2012

The Expendables 2 v Ted

Last weekend I hired out Expendables 2.

Movie Info
The Expendables are back and this time it's personal... Barney Ross (Sylvester Stallone), Lee Christmas (Jason Statham), Yin Yang (Jet Li), Gunnar Jensen (Dolph Lundgren),Toll Road (Randy Couture) and Hale Caesar (Terry Crews) -- with newest members Billy the Kid (Liam Hemsworth) and Maggie (Yu Nan) aboard -- are reunited when Mr. Church (Bruce Willis) enlists the Expendables to take on a seemingly simple job. The task looks like an easy paycheck for Barney and his band of old-school mercenaries. But when things go wrong and one of their own is viciously killed, the Expendables are compelled to seek revenge in hostile territory where the odds are stacked against them.
 
This film was perfect hangover fodder, watched on a tiny iMac computer with my buddy Neil. It is by far the shittest film I had seen in a long time. The writing is so hacky and the action, all though being all-balls, is pretty dull. I mean to say the writing was shitty would probably be doing shitty writing a dis-service. It is beyond shitty. That said, everything is forgiven because it is fantastically over the top (not as fantastic as Over the Top, the 80's Sly classic about underground Arm Wrestling). When something is over the top, it loses a sense of credulity, and takes me out of the movie. But when something is so fantastically over the top, it becomes laughable, and I will take laughable over lack of credulity any day. Me and my buddy laughed at all the Schwarzenneger moments, especially when he rips through a wall with a digger and barks 'I'm Back', through the fog of his own chewed cigar. I am however getting slightly bored of people saying how cool it would look with Stallone, Schwarzenneger, Willis, Norris, Lungdren all in a line firing bazookas at tanks. It would have looked cool 20 years ago, just like The Rolling Stones would have looked cool gyrating on stage. Remember how cool it did look when Bill Duke gets the mini gun out in Predator? Then one after another Arnie and Carl Weathers, they all join in and mow down the rainforest with their assault rifles. Yes THAT looked cool, thats because THAT was 20 years ago.
 
TOMATO METER - 66% (critics)
TOMATO METER - 72% (audience)
PETER METER - 61%
 
Now on to Ted.
 
Movie Info
Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane brings his boundary-pushing brand of humor to the big screen for the first time as writer, director and voice star of Ted. In the live action/CG-animated comedy, he tells the story of John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg), a grown man who must deal with the cherished teddy bear who came to life as the result of a childhood wish...and has refused to leave his side ever since.
 
I watched this alone, hungover, and vulnerable.
The night before I started work on a new book chronicalling the shags of my buddy Rob Jones. We teamed up later in the Swan with Boundy and Dan Smith. I left early but the guys came back after, broke in to my flat and recorded a podcast. They wrecked the keyboard to my iMac and left muddy footprints in the garden. I will release the drunken illegal podcast, in it's entirity, at a later date. (www.podomatic.com/thewrongbox)
 
Anyway the night after, I nursed my wounds with some Hopping Hare ale and watched Ted.
So the film is actually pretty funny. It's lewd all the way through, which may or may not be your thing but if you've seen the trailer or indeed the film poster you should have a decent idea of what you're getting yourself in for. I think it's actually targetted at the early thirties age bracket because of the comedy references to Flash Gordon, Frasier, Airplane and Top Gun. The only downside is that people in their mid thirties should maybe be above this kind of humour by now. Or am I being a prude dick? Probably. By the way the Airplane scene was a misstep.
 
TOMATO METER - 69% (critics)
TOMATO METER - 80% (audience)
PETER METER - 78%
 
I was amused by both, but whilst one was over the top without being Over the Top, and the had scenes from Airplane without being Airplane, (98% on Rotton Tomatoes by the way) I would say watch Over the Top and Airplane and NOT Expendables 2 or Ted.

Sunday 16 December 2012

Die Hard 4.0 v Red Lights

Didn't get the chance to go to the cinema this week due to a succession of debilitating hangovers, so I revisited Die Hard 4 this week on DVD. 



MOVIE INFO

An old-fashioned cop emerges to foil a high-tech attack on the country's computer infrastructure as Bruce Willis brings back one of the biggest action franchises in screen history. It's been over a decade since audiences last saw New York cop John McClane (Willis), but now, as the world's greatest criminal mastermind (Timothy Olyphant) attempts to cripple the entire country with an innovative act of technological terrorism, only one cop can insure that the integrity of the system stays intact. In this, the fourth installment of the long-running action series, Underworld director Len Wiseman picks up the torch formerly carried by directors John McTiernan and Renny Harlin to helm a script penned by Mark Bomback.

When my flatmate moved out over the summer, he left a box of wine by the foot of his bed. It was a slight disappointment to find the box empty of wine, but filled with summer blockbusters that I had seen, and mentally disposed of long ago. But I was drunk anyway so the thought of watching Die Hard 4 (Live free or Die Hard) again, was actually quite appealing to my dullened mind. 

I made some notes on my BlackBerry at the time of watching;

1. Watching people watching computers on my computer is not altogether inspiring.

2. The bad guys costume or lack of, was a massive misstep 

3. I can't believe Darius Danesh got such high billing in this film. (look up Cliff Curtis on IMDB for that hilarious analogy).

4. James Bond would never talk to himself out loud.

5. The common thread in all Die Hard movies is that Willis always gets to speak to the main villain on a walkie talkie that belonged to a henchman, that Willis has just killed. 

TOMATO-METER - 81% (critics)

TOMATO-METER - 86% (audience)

PETER-METER - 72%

The next day I sobered and went to the library for some peace and quiet. I rented out the latest Coldplay Album, Romeo and Juliet (Manga comic edition) and Red Lights on DVD. 

MOVIE INFO

Veteran paranormal researchers Dr. Margaret Matheson (Sigourney Weaver) and Tom Buckley (Cillian Murphy) debunk fraudulent claims of ghost whispering, faith healing and other psychic phenomena by detecting what Matheson calls "red lights," the subtle tricks behind every staged supernatural occurrence. But when the legendary blind psychic Simon Silver (Robert De Niro)comes out of retirement after 30 years, his once-fearless adversary Matheson warns Buckley to back off, fearing reprisal from the powerful Silver. Determined to discredit Silver, Buckley and his star student (Elizabeth Olsen) use every tool at their disposal to uncover the truth behind the charismatic, spoon-bending, mind reader. But Buckley is forced to reexamine his own core beliefs as his quest builds to a mind-blowing conclusion in this taut psychological thriller from award-winning writer and director Rodrigo Cortés. 
A couple of things. I saw this drunk in the evening, passed out. Come morning I was eager to catch the second act and watched it on a hangover. At the time i remember thinking this is a really interesting premise for me. Following the people for whom its job it is to debunk psychic phenomena. They reveal tricks used my mediums, such as lifting chairs and tables of the ground by simple use of counter weights and distraction. Very clever stuff, and interestingly portrayed. The visual aesthetic has a very chic look, almost clinical, which I liked. The main problem I had was the writing seemed a little hacky at times and Cillian Murphy although blessed with the most striking cheek bones, is a bit of a charisma vacuum in a lead role. He has yet to convince me. The ending is problematic and i didn't feel that it worked with all the things leading up to it. It felt messy and ultimately let the rest of the movie (that was hanging on by a thread at that point anyway) down. 
Not without merit, but I wonder what will become of Cillian Murphy. He will no doubt go on to do better things, but what sort career will he carve out for himself. He is almost like a writer that has yet to find his voice. 

TOMATO-METER - 29% (critics)

TOMATO-METER - 36% (audience)

PETER-METER  - 45%

I think Cillian Murphy is best used sparingly. Inception is indubitably his finest hour, but I should also say that I have seen the Dark Knight Rises 3 times this week. How sad and wretched my life has become. He is of course the Scarecrow character that features in all three of the Nolan Batmans. So best for me being The Dark Knight. So watch THE DARK KNIGHT and not DIE HARD 4 or RED LIGHTS. 



Saturday 8 December 2012

Silver Linings Playbook v The Omega Man

Silver Linings Playbook (In theatres now)


MOVIE INFO

Life doesn't always go according to plan. Pat Solatano (Bradley Cooper) has lost everything -- his house, his job, and his wife. He now finds himself living back with his mother (Jacki Weaver) and father (Robert DeNiro) after spending eight months is a state institution on a plea bargain. Pat is determined to rebuild his life, remain positive and reunite with his wife, despite the challenging circumstances of their separation. All Pat's parents want is for him to get back on his feet-and to share their family's obsession with the Philadelphia Eagles football team. When Pat meets Tiffany (Jennifer Lawrence), a mysterious girl with problems of her own, things get complicated. Tiffany offers to help Pat reconnect with his wife, but only if he'll do something very important for her in return. As their deal plays out, an unexpected bond begins to form between them, and silver linings appear in both of their lives. 

So finally a film about crazy people that are good looking yeah? 
Alone in the cinema again, some new kid on the till tried to over charge me two quid for a pack of revels. When they say all the action starts in the foyer they weren't wrong. So to the film then. I first saw Jennifer Lawrence in X-men first class and now I try and see her whenever I can, in what ever capacity. In this she outshines Bradley Cooper quite comfortably who isn't really trying anything new here. 
At the end of this film I could hear many people sobbing in the theatre. For once I was not part of the chorus of sniffles or sobs, but I was moved, slightly. The film has undeniable charm, and the  finale ticked a lot of the right boxes.
Rotten Tomatoes (critics 90%)
Rotten Tomatoes (audience 87%)
Peter-Meter (84%)

Now onto The Omega Man (available on DVD at Braintree Library)

MOVIE INFO

This second film adaptation of Richard Matheson's science-fiction novel I Am Legend (the first version being The Last Man on Earth with Vincent Price) unfolds in a post-apocalyptic 1976. Charlton Heston is Robert Neville, the sole recipient of a serum that enabled him to survive an onslaught of germ warfare between Russia and China - which seemingly rendered him the last (normal) human alive. Neville lives in a garish, antique-strewn L.A. penthouse. During the day, he roams through the vacant city. At night, he fends off a bloodthirsty horde of mutant scavengers garbed in Spanish inquisition robes and sunglasses, led by Matthias (Anthony Zerbe), a former television newscaster in his good ol' pre-mutant days. Matthias and his half-human vampires want to kill Neville. Neville's last man on earth status is shattered when he comes across a group of young people, presided over by the sexy and cynical Lisa (Rosalind Cash). Neville begins to form an interest in her, as the two try to keep Matthias and his minions at bay. The Omega Man was filmed in downtown Los Angeles on Saturday afternoons, an area that consists almost exclusively of office buildings, and therefore was suitably vacant at the the time of production. In 2007, Matheson's novel received yet another incarnation - this one with Will Smith in the Heston role.

You remember in I Am Legend how cool the mutant vampires looked and how tense it was whenever they showed up on screen? Well there is none of that in this. Instead replace the cool looking mutant/vampires with the little pointy hooded Jawas that were scavengers of the desert in the first Star Wars movie. Remember in I Am Legend how Will Smith had metal shutters on his house, turned off all the lights and slept in the bath tub with his dog and shotgun? Well in this one of the first scenes features Charlton Heston drinking brandy on the balcony, all the lights and music are pumping out of his villa like he's fucking Rod Stewart, but in the evening time! He is making no attempt to hide from the living dead at all!
The only thing I really like about these kind of films is how they manage to empty all the streets to make it look deserted. Reading the info above now I know. But sometimes scenes in films where the streets are deserted look amazing. I'm thinking perhaps more of the opening to Vanilla Sky where they shut down Time Square for Tom Cruise to run around in. GREAT GREAT visual. Imagine how much money that one scene would have took and the amount of work involved in shutting down Time Square during the day! And it was just a dream sequence aswel, not even integral to the plot!
Anyway this film has nice ideas, but the ideas are in the book so it gets no kudos for that.
Oh and christ the music in this is bad. Probably the worst soundtrack to a film I've ever heard. Please check it out for that reason alone. 
Rotten Tomatoes (critics 59%)
Rotten Tomatoes (audience 35%)
Peter-Meter (24%)
If Silver Linings Playbook had been slightly funnier I may have put it in my top 5 films of the year. If you want to see a film with crazy people played in a more humorous way then invest in As Good as it Gets. It has the right level of sentiment and humour. So watch AS GOOD AS IT GETS, and not SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK and certainly not, THE OMEGA MAN. 



Sunday 2 December 2012

Margaret v The Ghost and the Darkness

The Ghost and the Darkness (available on BBC iPlayer)


MOVIE INFO

A man bringing modern transportation to the ancient jungles of Africa discovers one of man's oldest enemies lays in wait for him in this period adventure drama. John Beaumont (Tom Wilkinson) is the owner of a British railroad firm who is building a rail line through Uganda. A bridge is needed so that the tracks may cross a large river, and engineer John Henry Patterson (Val Kilmer) is summoned to the African nation to supervise construction. While Beaumont has placed Patterson under a strict deadline, the bridge designer is certain that with his guidance, the local laborers will be able to complete the job in time. However, when several workers are killed in an attack by a lion, Patterson is forced to deal with the animal; while he bags a lion who invades the work site one evening, it soon becomes obvious that there's more than one predator in the nearby jungle. The lion attacks continue, eventually claiming the lives of 130 men, and Patterson and Beaumont finally agree to call in Charles Remmington (Michael Douglas), an expert hunter who understands the nature of the man-eaters and knows how to lure them into his trap. The Ghost and the Darkness is based on a true story, which was previously brought to the screen in 1953, in Arch Oboler's pioneering 3-D adventure Bwana Devil.

I watched this drunk on Friday and here are the notes I made.
VAL KILMER - There is something about Val Kilmer, when he looks interested, he makes good movies they look like this, when he phones it in they look like the shittiest Batman. 
TOM WILKINSON - Unfortunate that such a talented actor is giving such woeful dialogue to depict the depravity of his one dimensional character.
MICHAEL DOUGLAS - I thought this was a tale of two Europeans? Val Kilmer is just about attempting to be Irish. But Douglas just isn't trying. And I think i prefer him like that. If anything he sounds more Yankee.
So the film has dated pretty bad in terms of CGI. I thought the first half hour was probably the best set up to a monster movie that I had witnessed in ages. But the lions show up and the special effects are pretty bad. Enough to take you out of the film. But Douglas arrives, offers some swagger, peps it up a bit and shifts the film back into a decent gear. The main star of the movie is the landscape and the film shows a genuinely affectionate portrayal of Africa. Unfortunately this film fails on a few levels.
Shitty writing.
Bad special effects.
Lack of credulity. (It's based on a true story, in real life two lions killed a maximum of 24 people, in the film they have reportedly killed up to 135 and have a Den of human remains that would put Predator to shame.)
Rotten Tomatoes (critics) 50%
Rotten Tomatoes (audience) 43%
Peter - Meter 64%
Last night I got drunk and watched Margaret 

MOVIE INFO

Margaret centers on a 17-year-old New York City high-school student who feels certain that she inadvertently played a role in a traffic accident that has claimed a woman's life. In her attempts to set things right she meets with opposition at every step. Torn apart with frustration, she begins emotionally brutalizing her family, her friends, her teachers, and most of all, herself. She has been confronted quite unexpectedly with a basic truth: that her youthful ideals are on a collision course against the realities and compromises of the adult world.
The first thing I should mention is that this film sounds great. There is a scene where a bus driver runs over a woman, (and that is not a spoiler because it is in the trailer and no one reads these posts), and it's very jarring, a long build up and the aftermath of that scene is pretty grueling. It ultimately is a film about a breakdown in relationships, the main one being between the mother and daughter. Also it's a film about peoples flaws. There are not a lot of likeable people in this film and at times you are torn on who to champion. Also it's fucking long man. I mean 3 hours. I'm not sure if I saw the extended cut, but I felt like I didn't just watch this film, I survived it. This is also the most Directed film I've seen in a long time. Noticelably long panoramic shots of the city, plus a lot of scenes where the main conversation is drowned out by surrounding conversations. A bit like when Superman sits in a restaurant. Sometimes it works to great effect, other times I felt it a little bit annoying,
The main chick is Anna Paquin, and she must be watchable because I bathed myself in this film for 3 hours. Afterwards, when it finished, I felt lonely. Like I had just immersed myself in a computer game that I had not particularly enjoyed, but had some how become dependent.  There's a lot of crying, screaming and more crying. Again, after 3 hours it got slightly graining, but surely she can't be faulted for giving her all. Maybe the director could have reigned it in a little, or simply cut about an hour of the film.
Keiran Culken is good in this, and his scenes are the best because they have purpose.
Jean Reno is good but his scenes are depicting a dull relationship, and unfortunately, it makes his scenes pretty boring too. 
Matt Damon falls into the same category, as does Matthew Broderick.
oh and Mark Ruffalo is good, but he is not in it enough, which is probably another failing because his character is instrumental to the plot of the film.
Ultimately this is a good film, with some powerful scenes. I think you could have shaved at least half hour of this film and it wouldn't have missed a beat. It also suffers as one of those films that could end at several points. And by the end, you're fucking willing it to.
Rotten Tomatoes (critics 72%)
Rotten Tomatoes (audience 52%)
Peter - Meter 78%
I can't help thinking that Keiren Culken has a great film around the corner that is really going to launch him. If you don't believe me watch him in SCOTT PILGRIM v THE WORLD and not MARGARET or THE GHOST AND THE DARKNESS.